Saturday, July 14, 2007

quid pro quo 2. Sluts, Whores, sexual definitions and porn!

Ok, in my last blog I bitched about the times when someone expects you to be representative for the whole gay community because in many ways I'm not . But I realize that there are generalizations and stereotypes for a reason, because in many ways I am typical or at least similar. And another Gemini trait is enjoying passing on information...and some of it's true even. So...why don't we share our info with each other.
1. What do you define as sex? In other words..when I am asked how many sexual partners I've had in my life I honestly have no clue. Guess a big number. Now times it by 3 and we might be close. But realize that I'm not talking about people I've fucked or been fucked by. I don't have penetrative sex every time I mess around with somebody. If we are only counting people I've fucked the number is significantly lower. It's probably still in Whore Country, but lower. Most straight friends and lots of the gay ones I've talked to only count fucking as sex. Anything else is irrelevant. But If I'm getting naked with someone and fooling around and getting off..it counts as something. I think it's all kind of arbitrary. You got sexual with someone. Not counting acts such as oral sex only really means anything if your trying to protect your reputation or your (gasp!) virginity! It just seems really middle school to me, so I don't distinguish between the type of sex act. It's all basically sex to me. But...other people think different due to their personal experiences. What do you think?
2. FYI- when I use words like whore and slut I don't mean them derogatory. I mean them in the most sex positive way. Unless the context is you not respecting me in terms of my boyfriend. Then I mean slut as in you dirty skank ho. I know it can be confusing..so I will try to use skank or ho when I'm using it negatively. And then it has nothing to do with how much sex you have with how many partners. It's more of a character thing. Or a angry thing on my part. So next question...what do the words slut or whore mean to you (other than a slut gives it away when a whore gets something else out of the deal). When is a large number of partners too many or too gross or too slutty whorish?
3.I read a study on the differences between gay and straight porn, and it was fascinating. I could probably just blog about that sometime. One difference is the amount of kissing actually. Apparently, and I don't have much first hand experience with straight porn, there isn't much kissing in them. There's not kissing in every gay porn...but its usually there. Is there no kissing in other porn? I've heard another difference is the attractiveness of the guys. I have conflicting accounts on this though. I've been told that the men in gay porn are a lot hotter, with better bodies because straight men don't want to see hot guys. It also makes it more of an everyman kinda role being played on the screen. But I've had lots of gay men tell me the opposite. I hear the guys in bi porn are the hottest with the biggest dicks. I'm no virgin to porn at all...but it's usually only gay porn. I know guys that have bi porn on the off chance they get a straight or bi guy over, but I always feel kinda wigged out watching it. Like I'm violating the girl and myself by watching her. I can see the nastiest degrading sex with two or more guys and don't feel that way however. But I respect women...heh.Plus vagina kinda turns me off. If your straight can you watch gay porn? Bi? My friend Melissa used to be memorized by the gay porn playing at Silverado on the TV's when we went for a drink. I always found that interesting. 'But I don't imagine that two guys fucking is usually the same for women as lesbian porn is for most men. Excuse me...thats Man made lesbian porn. Lesbian made lesbian porn in a whole different ballgame. (it's a ball free game actually).
The study also stated that porn is a lot more taboo in the hetero world than in the gay society. I know for me and most gay men I watch porn with that its a lot weirder if you don't have any than if you have a library of it. What do you think?
I guess I have a lot of topics here. Tell me your thoughts on porn in relation to this if you would. So if you want to join in ..please....we're talking about sluts and whores and is what do you define as sex and are you watching porn while doing it? lol

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